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Right Now

I am on a high right now for two reasons, from the coffee I had two hours ago, as well as (and more importantly) from the amazing evening I've been enjoying with my friend Tanya. We have History: The World to 1500 together and she lives two floors above me, so I've gotten to know her through early morning breakfast and time spent in the House. Every time we talk, we get into something REAL, and I gain insight into her perspective. Talking with her this evening, I realized how much I need to be involved in something with Native American cultural studies. It is my driving force; I am called to study the California Native culture, and I know I need to do something with that passion so I can benefit others. I went to a film screening of The Canary Effect last night, a film about the genocidal policies the United States government has had toward the indigenous people of this land. It hit home for me that Native American culture is not only the culture that developed before contact with Europeans, which is what I find so incredibly fascinating, but also the culture that exists right now and the issues that the Native peoples face because of oppression and injustice. I thought about how I want to teach what I learn about the Native culture to other people, and I've always thought it might be in a regional, state or national park setting, but why not in the Native American reservation setting? Why not teach it to the children whose ancestors I'm teaching about? I know right now that I need to study and learn as much as I can about the California Native cultures, and that at some point the right position will present itself. I believe that life opens doors when they should be opened, and it's up to us to walk through them and take those opportunities. I have so many opportunities on this campus to do things that I enjoy, but I need to find the ones that I feel most passionate about, and I need to leave time for myself to discover things on my own and read and draw and explore the natural world around me. Spending hours talking, listening to music and building friendships is so much more valuable to me than spending hours taking history notes. The history notes will get done when I have the pressure that I have to get them done, but opportunities of friendship like tonight don't happen every day, so when they present themselves I take them.

Earlier, Tanya introduced me to the quotations of Chuck Palahniuk. I love the quotes we read, and I'm interested in reading his work. Here are some that I found particularly worthwhile.

"All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring."
— Chuck Palahniuk

^ Do not be boring. Noted :)

"We all die. The goal isn't to live forever, the goal is to create something that will."
— Chuck Palahniuk

^ TOTALLY reminds me of Gilgamesh.

"Nothing of me is original. I am the combined effort of everyone I've ever known."
— Chuck Palahniuk (Invisible Monsters)

"The unreal is more powerful than the real. Because nothing is as perfect as you can imagine it. Because its only intangible ideas, concepts, beliefs, fantasies that last. Stone crumbles. Wood rots. People, well, they die. But things as fragile as a thought, a dream, a legend, they can go on and on. If you can change the way people think. The way they see themselves. The way they see the world. You can change the way people live their lives. That's the only lasting thing you can create."
— Chuck Palahniuk (Choke)

Tanya just shared her blog with me, and I am in shock! She is very talented, even in the blog's most raw form without any editing or revision. I am definitely jealous. I need to write more, blog more, write poetry more, spend time with friends more. I love this evening and this life and being alive.

I feel the need to go do something outside, under the sky, barefooted, with no constraints or concerns. Beautiful, confusing, complex, happy life!

Green Gal


  1. Great post! College is such a great time to connect with new friends, explore new horizons, discover ourselves (and take history notes!)

    Thanks for sharing your enthusiasm for life. It never stops being beautiful, confusing, complex, and hopefully alway happy!


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